do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Randomize