if only i could text you this smell
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
