is wine microwaveable?
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
The guy I blew last night was pierced in multiple places. I had to use extra caution to avoid my temporary filling.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I'm pretty sure I broke my breathalyzer by breathing vaporized vodka into it.
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