Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
You know you're an adult when you start planning your hookup a week in advance
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
