I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
Sunscreen. In my vag. I hate summer sex.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize