yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
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Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Just had a talk about safe sex with my mom. Not about protection. About the very real possibility of a "penile fracture". Gotta love having a nurse for a mother.
They were scared I was going to get lost last night so they dressed me up as Waldo so someone would always find me.
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It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
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