Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
you called me drunk last night to talk about summoning sex demons with magic WTF
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
Randomize
