Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
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you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
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he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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