with your own penis?
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
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He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
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