The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
we went to the store to buy cookie dough and conditionally went straight towards the booze
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
I'm at about main and main street
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
