Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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Sorry msmoxy hasn't picked any favorites yet.

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(425): View more from Washington

Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.

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(231): View more from Michigan

My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.

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(613): View more from Ontario

I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.

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(407): View more from Florida

Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.

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(512): View more from Texas

It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"

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(330): View more from Ohio

sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.

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(607): View more from New York

Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

There is this guy in here. He didn't even get ice cream he just filled up his cup with mini marshmellows, chocolate syrup, about a lb of grahm cracker crumbs and walked around to everyone in the shop saying "hey, hey look here, I just made fucking s'mores." He was SO proud of himself.

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