the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
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