WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
I stole a fireplace last night.
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
Randomize