I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
