so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
Lets go see if some hobos will give us a prostate massage for a 40 ounce.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
