Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
im holly from the hills drunk
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Randomize
