So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
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