oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
You seriously need to keep doing my sexting for me. I just said something about "riding cock like a dick rodeo"
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So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
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I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize