You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
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