You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
I just got turned down by a drunk fat chick. At my own birthday party. God hates me.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
havent showered in 2 days. just Febrezed my balls in the car before going into a movie alone with a 40 of Guinness.there isn't a word in English for how single I am.
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Randomize
