it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
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heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
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I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up