I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
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