I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
