How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
well you can't waste a boner
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I have a fruit stripe tattoo on my penis. You're the only person I know who chews that gum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
Randomize