my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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