How did I get so drunk? We had to fish that girl out of the Goodwill Donation Box.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I've spent my afternoon dipping strawberries in DayQuil if that's any indication of where I'm at in life.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
