Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
Best case scenario: sex with hot bartender \nWorst case scenario: no sex and punched by tattooed guy that may or may not be said bartenders boyfriend.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
i now understand why vodka
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
So turns out my new assistant isn't really my assistant. The owner needed a title for his FWB so his wife wouldn't catch on. I got a three hundred a month credit limit boost on my corporate credit card instead.
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