I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I'm 2 weeks in to my all dick and carb diet and so far I've lost 2lbs.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
Randomize
