I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just did a Kegel and my back popped. My vagina is a gift to penises everywhere.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
Just found out that the guy I lost my virginity to voted for Gary Johnson. It's almost more upsetting then him ending up being a massive asshole.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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