C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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