The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
my life trainwreck boards at 9:30
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
sometimes i think my sole purpose in life is to cockblock my roommate
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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