Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize