if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize