OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Still borderline I believe. As bad as this sounds, I feel God owes me one here and should not let his grandmother die till after my birthday
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
Oh boy I hope we come out of this alive. And with clean prison records
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
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