..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
The producers of Marley and Me owe me about $5 million. That's the dollar amount of embarrassment compensation required for making a 24-year-old male cry publicly on an airplane while sitting in the middle seat between a gorgeous babe and a guy with a do-rag
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
i think i broke my dog last night...fuck
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
So I've been spending my morning trying to figure out if there's a corealation between Wednesday margarita night and the boat that's now in my living room.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
You were trust falling into bushes
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
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