garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
So I'm eating my burger minding my own business, when the guy next to me starts up a conversation. Seemed normal at first, stocks, bonds, etc...then he said...and I quote "I can push a bowling-ball up a flight of stairs with my tongue." As I awkwardly laughed he broke out "I bet you I could bite the head off of a rabbit."
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
3 things I learned last night: 1.) I'm not as light as I used to be. 2.) Sex on the roof of a convertible is a really bad idea. 3.) The hospital now has super glue pens for sealing minor cuts instead of stitches!
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Randomize
