so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Also what is the name of Americas thing where we had a holy obligation to expand westward? I'm going name my new lighter that.
New found love of volunteering, when there's free wine available at all times. Good times. And I get to to feel good about helping people.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
