How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
Randomize