Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize
