wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
If everyone lived like me, we would need 5.9 earths. Fuck yes america.
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
Randomize
