I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
Randomize
