One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
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