im gay
i know
yea but for you.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
He said I did a backflip off the thing on the doorframe and busted my ass. I'd give anything to remember
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
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