I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
