Cold hands, warm shart.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
I wish we had a justin bieber to wanna fuck when we were younger... But noooo we just had hanson
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
I would have been very attracted to her had she not been reading me my Miranda Rights
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
He just ate a tooth whitening strip...
I did not marry a roomba.
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