oh god the rape fog is back!
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
Randomize
