Joe is yelling at the trees again.
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
but seriously, if you see a redhead running down the street tonight in a carrot costume, call 911. He's tripping hard.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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