Betty ford says i'm here all night
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I opened my eyes to the dog snorting coke, I decided it was best to just close my eyes and forget what I saw
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
