If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I will be naked everywhere
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
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