ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
i DID NOT walk around with my knees bent and my hands behind my back with long spandex and underarmour pretending to be Apollo Ono
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize
