My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
Randomize