When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
